Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize