Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?

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  (206): So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia? http://tfl.nu/7m55
  Replies (14) Good night (613) Bad night (3565)
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?

  (1-905): View more from Toronto

  Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.

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  (905): You had a beer at 10:30 this morning? (1-905): Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol. http://tfl.nu/apvz
  Replies (30) Good night (3814) Bad night (592)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE

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  (845): I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE http://tfl.nu/lkt9
  Replies (37) Good night (523) Bad night (4317)
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  (914): View more from New York

  i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same

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  (914): i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same http://tfl.nu/tcqj
  Replies (39) Good night (1020) Bad night (5476)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...

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  (614): Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write... http://tfl.nu/09db
  Replies (10) Good night (1680) Bad night (4162)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.

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  (419): You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out. http://tfl.nu/n9rj
  Replies (17) Good night (6015) Bad night (1038)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  anything for my little brother.

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  (440): thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet. (440): anything for my little brother. http://tfl.nu/0dq6
  Replies (6) Good night (4994) Bad night (749)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?

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  (856): I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right? http://tfl.nu/8yrh
  Replies (11) Good night (1327) Bad night (530)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell

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  (702): One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell http://tfl.nu/48fd
  Replies (8) Good night (784) Bad night (433)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.

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  (305): It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs. http://tfl.nu/6i5r
  Replies (4) Good night (361) Bad night (1081)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.

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  (386): Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately. http://tfl.nu/yc56
  Replies (1) Good night (1244) Bad night (271)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do

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  (734): If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do http://tfl.nu/wpum
  Replies (7) Good night (1115) Bad night (230)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!

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  (256): I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight! http://tfl.nu/qi7p
  Replies (3) Good night (690) Bad night (586)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.

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  (479): He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish. http://tfl.nu/o2hu
  Replies (0) Good night (421) Bad night (213)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?

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  (618): You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming? http://tfl.nu/vj0c
  Replies (3) Good night (408) Bad night (634)

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