i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
