I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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