Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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