who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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