I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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