we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
