The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I am midnight drunk by noon
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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