lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
