Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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