Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize