Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
