I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
