I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
