If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Operation Purity has been aborted
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
that is very illegal...i love you.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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