From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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