I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
