idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize