wat bout pragnant strippers??
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
