3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
