I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize