did you get engaged???
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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