Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
