I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
