I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
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I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
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Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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