i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
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