just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
We need a shit load of segways right now
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
