i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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