so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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