I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
