she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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