Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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