and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
