Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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