Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
