so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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