she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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