1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
