In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
