Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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