She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
