I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
