Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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