Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
