i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
