Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
not ubering you a puppy
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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