My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
