Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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