dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
