Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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