I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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